The relationship between a school teacher made five gold codes to assess the long-term
success of the marriage. When you select a For Life, absolutely no one to do the wrong choice, but when the divorce rate as high as 50 percent when you know there are a lot of people in the choice of his (her) when the partner has committed a serious mistake. If you really wanted to play and looking for a partner for life, here’s five questions you should ask yourself.
One problem: We have a common goal of living it?
If you have been married 20 or 30 years, it was a long time. How do you plan to have this period of time? Eat together, running? You have to, and his (her) to share a deeper more meaningful things, you have to have a common goal of life.
In a marriage, there are two situations occur: You can grow up together, or grow their own. 50 percent of people are growing their own, it is necessary to make a successful marriage you have to know the bottom line in life, what you want, and then marry (or marry) a person like you.
Second problem: his (her) to share feelings and ideas, feel safe?
The problem and the quality of the relationship between you, “feel safe” means that you can open and the communication, good communication is based on trust. Point to be honest to ourselves! To identify the object you want to get married is that you feel emotionally safe.
Three problems: he (she) is worthy of respect, a very special someone?
The question is: he (she) is a noble and sensitive human beings? How do you test his (her)?
Here are some suggestions: he (she) is in general as a basis for personal growth approach? He (she) is seriously to improve their own? It was “good” under a definition that is a regular and strive to do the right thing. So ask your other half: his (her) how to make use of his (her) time?
There are basically two types of people in this world: one is dedicated to personal growth, and another is to seek a comfortable life. That would be comfortable living as a goal, the individual will enjoy in the first place. In his (her) onto the red carpet before, you must be aware of this.
Four issues: his (her) how to deal with other people?
The promotion of human relationships most important thing is to give. The so-called grant, is to make others happy. To see whether or not this person like to give? He had nothing to do for those people who are kind of situation? For example: waiter, bus drivers, and so on. How to deal with his parents and brothers and sisters? He knows how to appreciate it? If he was to give him all the things people do not know how to appreciate, do not expect him to be grateful to you. He said others would gossip and the ill of it? The gossip will not know how to love people, you can determine if he is not good for others, you will not be good.
Five issues: whether the marriage would like to change this person?
There are too many of the wrong person, in the hope that the marriage is “change” his spouse. You may want to change a person after marriage … … may be getting worse, if you do not fully accept his (her) what it is today, you have not yet ready to marry. In conclusion, you have to love stage with a small-minded point with dim sum.
Married, you do not have their eyes open?
We do not expect a marriage of love must be the most pure crystal, but the face of such a major life choices, you may be wrong repent his life, so between men and women to choose partners should keep their eyes open and grasp the gold code, do not you make mistakes!
The first to marry the wrong reasons – Jianggeyiqiu for marriage and marriage.
This is clearly the most stupid mistakes.
The second wrong reason to marry – to flee their home.
This is generally the girls will be mistakes. In order from the unhappy home, or to escape control, the yearning for freedom, girls are often married by the purpose to achieve. In fact, this is a false illusion of independence.
The third wrong reasons — marriage from children’s lives.
You will be surprised, even though contraception so easy, this old story is still very high frequency. Although the new version is slightly different times, in the coercion of women to marry the man, said that although she did have the courage to unwed mothers, however, is still old wine in new bottle. I am afraid that other people want to lock-in the heart, they would have been a hold-up.
The fourth wrong reasons — marriage in order to defy the orders of parents.
Whether parents think their children are too young or that their children or inappropriate choice of the wife, could rise to a strong reverse psychology. In particular, is a rebellious character of the parties, often in order to resist and the will to resist. However, it is necessary to remind you that it may be that parents resist the worst of the most dangerous time.
The fifth wrong reasons — marriage marry a Millionaire, get rich.
Block to find a woman on Gold Mountain, who can say no good? All the money, despite a wealth of fiscal and other aspects of fear may not be so smug.
The sixth error of marriage — only reason he is a handsome guy to.
Toshio Everybody Loves beauty, the power of beauty skelter. In addition to the beauty only other requirements are lacking, could become a great tragedy, but do not forget the appearance of the high rate of depreciation Oh.
The seventh marriage wrong reasons — the desire to.
Believe it or not, men more likely to become victims of desire. Men often marry in the eyes is not the favorite, but the desire to contain their women.
Eighth wrong reasons — marriage because I am lonely.
modern, Pa Jimo. Women as men on this lonely struggle and go on. Would rather quarrel killing, is better than sleep alone.
Ninth married the wrong reasons — the search for a sense of security.
This sense of security things, in addition to their own, others can not give. Imagine that you prefer to rely on the shoulder and would rather not, how can you do?
Tenth wrong reasons — marriage out of the single.
Many women still do not believe that late marriage and marriage can not be a mature choice. To press the biological clock, social pressure, so afraid of older mothers and other factors, will be the case in order to break the single and married. What is most ridiculous is that a woman told me that even if the marriage a week on divorce, and marriage should not have to end first.
Tenth of a wrong reason to marry — want to be the bride.
However, there are still such a ridiculous woman, the marriage as a program. Make-up you, you take pictures, you banquet is not only fun, and a round of the bride’s dream. Many people only when they did not know the day of Princess Margaret.
In the 12th wrong reason to marry — love to be married.
In fact, love may not want to get married. Modern life has many times the opportunity to love, like beading, each have a complete and has its own elegance.
In the 13th wrong reasons — marriage because of their age.
True love is not your age to determine your happiness. If you do not make good choices because of their age who can put you in life, personality, spiritual aspects of the other half of the match, and not really fall in love grave it? You should have this every day boring life. It was just living in prison, which is the most common mistakes of the girls.
Life as choice can not be based on love, this may sound not quite right but there are profound reasons exist. Love, marriage is not the only basis, but it is a good marriage: you can not just love to create a life-long relationship, you need more.